


Softly, My Frail Heart Beats Brokenly

by ReliantWishes



Category: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, Thilbo Bagginshield - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Loss, M/M, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-01
Updated: 2014-12-14
Packaged: 2017-11-23 06:34:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/619141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReliantWishes/pseuds/ReliantWishes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.' - Kahlil Gibran</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was listening to 'Frail' by Jars of Clay and 'Still Love' by Holly Brook while writing this story for inspiration.

Thorin looked out over the battlefield and gave a harsh sigh. The battle was hard fought and at times it seemed like they would be overrun, but in the end the newly re-forged alliance of Elves, Men, and Dwarves overcame the seemingly un-ending hordes of Orc, Goblin, and Warg. They had won, but at the cost of so many lives.

Thorin Oakenshield and his company had succeeded at doing what all others thought impossible. They managed to drive Smaug out and reclaim Erebor and all its treasure, thanks to one person. One amazing little hobbit.

Bilbo.

The hardness left his eyes and the grim line of his lips softened into a small smile at the thought of the halfling. How the Hobbit had changed from the 'grocer' he had originally thought him to be.

How the halfling had changed them all. How he had changed him.

He was shaken from the trail his thoughts were leading him down by a voice yelling out his name.

"Thorin Oakenshield! Thank the valar I have found you! Come quick!"

He turned to face the grey wizard and whatever words he had planned to speak died as his eyes fell on the wizard's haggard appearance.

"Wizard, what has happened?"

"Make haste, my friend. Our burglar has been wounded." He replied in a grave tone.

There was an urgency to the wizard's words that filled him with ice. His eyes hardened once more as he spoke in a still voice.

"How bad?"

Gandalf shook his head, "He has been asking for you since he became conscious again."

Thorin started off in a run, but stopped and turned towards the wizard, a silent plea in his eyes.

Gandalf only said one thing, the only thing he needed to know.

"The tent of Elfking Thranduil."

With those words, the dwarfking turned and raced across the battlefield, everything and everyone a blur around him. Thoughts raced through his mind; the things he regretted saying to the hobbit and all the things he had yet to say to the halfling.

'Wait for me.'

/ ~ / ~ / ~ /

His lungs were screaming for relief by the time he got to the tent, stopping at the site of the elven guards stationed out front. Gandalf arrived shortly after him also breathing quite heavy. He turned at the sound of running feet to see Dwalin and Bofur arrive, followed closely behind Bifur, Bombur, Dori and Nori.

Thorin nodded to them in greeting as he struggled to catch his breathe.

Gandalf placed a hand on his shoulder and spoke, gasping for breath, "My friend, you ran as if an entire pack of wargs were at your heels."

Thorin shrugged off the wizard's hand and turned to Dwalin.

"Dwalin, where is Kili and Fili?" He asked.

"The lads were the ones who brought the halfling here. They were bloodied up good, but nothing serious. They'll live. Oin and Gloin are with them, getting bandaged up as well."

He breathed a little easier, knowing his nephews were still living and would be fine. The line of Durin still stands strong.

He turned sharply at the sound of the tent flap being opened.

His eyes widened as Balin and Ori emerged, accompanied by the Elfking.

Balin took one sweeping look of him from head to toe and shook his head, "My king, you look out of breath and ill at ease. Sit and rest a moment."

Thorin turned to glare at him, "I have no time for idle chatter, take me to him."

Thranduil shook his head, "You will rest first. The hobbit is stable for the moment."

The dwarfking stood his ground and glared at him. "Then I will rest at his side or not at all."

The Elfking tilted his head and gazed at the dwarf for a moment, his eyes piercing in their study of him. With a nod toward the Elven guards, they moved out of the way, allowing the King Under the Mountain entrance.

"Very well, Thorin, son of Thrain. Mithrandir, you may enter as well."

Thorin motioned to the other dwarves to stay outside, then he took a deep breath to steady himself and entered the tent.

/ ~ / ~ / ~ /

Whatever he thought he had been prepared for, the sight of the hobbit wrapped from neck to torso in bandages tinted pink from his blood was not one. He looked so small and helpless, so frail as he lay sleeping in the center of the much too large cot.

Time seemed to slow as he took heavy steps forward, he noticed the paleness of his skin, the grey pallor that had settled over him.

'It would not be long, then.' He couldn't explain the heavy feeling in his chest that that thought alone caused him.

Thorin stumbled as he reached the cot, falling to his knees beside him. He shakily reached a hand forward and gently touched the hobbit's cheek, but recoiled at the coldness of his skin.

He looked up at the Elfking, "Why is he so cold?"

"When life fades, warmth fades."

"Well, put more blankets on him. Keep him warm." Thorin angrily ordered.

"Th-Thorin."

He turned at the small voice and gave a simple quirk of the lips.

"Halfling."

"I...I have a-a name."

"I know."

"I..I-I'm sorry that I-I didn't listen to you. I should've listen-" His words faded into a deep racking cough that shook his tiny frame.

Thorin shushed him and cradled the hobbit's hand in his own, leaning closer to him. "Easy, Bilbo, calm yourself. If anyone should be sorry, it should be me. I was against you from the very start. If only I had trusted Gandalf, but no, I had to be arrogant and stubborn as all dwarves are most known for. I am truly sorry for all the words I have spoken towards you in anger. I am-"A small, soft finger pressed against his lips stilled him.

"Now who ha-has to be c..calm?" Bilbo wheezed at him, giving him a small crooked smile.

The dwarf smiled and shook his head at him in return.

It wasn't until Bilbo spoke again, but softer this time. "Thorin, why?"

He didn't understand the question until he felt the small fingers brush at his own cheeks. He was crying.

'Why the tears? Why are you crying for me?' That was the unspoken question in Bilbo's eyes.

He reached a hand forward and gently traced his burglar's face. "I have so many things to tell you, but I fear not enough time to tell you, little one."

"C..c-can you do something for me, Thorin?"

"Name it and it is done."

"C..can you hold me, I'm cold."

Thorin turned to Thranduil and only received a nod in response before he exited the tent. He looked to Gandalf and saw pain flooding his eyes and pouring down his cheeks. The wizard nodded to him and followed the Elfking outside.

Thorin's eyes settled back on Bilbo and only nodded in assent.

He stood up and removed his cloak before removing his sword belt, and then his boots before pulling the covers back and gently sliding in next to the hobbit facing him. He carefully pushed an arm underneath the hobbit and brought him forward.

The hobbit hummed in response and snuggled as close as his injuries would allow him. Thorin could only close his eyes in happiness to be holding his hobbit again.

'His?'

He looked down at the small figure in his arms and agreed with himself that yes, the hobbit was his. He wanted no other. The joyful realization was short-lived when Bilbo fell into a harsh, hacking cough that brought blood to his lips and reminded him that time was much too short and only getting shorter.

Something inside him urged him to speak, so he did.

"Bilbo Baggins."

At his name, the burglar looked up at him.

"I would renounce all I have reclaimed if it would allow you to live."

Bilbo's eyes widened at his words, "No, oh no. Not for me."

Thorin nodded in assent, "Yes, for you. There is more good in you than I have ever seen in others. A good deal of courage and wisdom, blended in measure. If more people valued food and merry-making, like you, over hoarded gold, then this world would be much better off."

Bilbo swallowed a sob, "But sad or merry, my king, I must leave it now."

He nodded slowly, tears falling from his eyes again. "I know, but allow me one last word."

The hobbit could only shake as Thorin leaned his forehead against Bilbo's.

"I love you, Bilbo Baggins." Before he closed the gap between their lips and kissed him ever so gently and then pulled back.

A strangled sob tore from Bilbo's throat as he whispered, "A..and I-I love you, Thorin Oakenshield."

One set of hands clasped together and held fast against each others hearts as Thorin pulled him closer and pressed their lips together gently again and again.

His lips did not leave Bilbo's until his breathing slowed. His hand dropped, slipping from Thorin's grasp...

And fell lifeless to the bed.

All that could be heard at that moment was the heart-wrenching sobbing of a king who lost a love he had just found mere moments ago.


	2. And Each Day It Heals A Little Bit More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I listened to 'Remember' by BrunuhVille while writing this.
> 
> 'Remember that every step that we have taken, every circumstance, has led us to where we need to be right now, to do what we need to do.' - David Bergen

It was a strange sight that greeted Otho Sackville-Baggins when he went to the market that day.

 

A procession of short bearded men on ponies were slowly making their way into Hobbiton.

 

In the middle of the procession was a simple looking wagon wreathed with greenery and flowers of every color imaginable.

 

A strange sight indeed.

 

They stopped in the middle of the marketplace square where a dark haired and bearded man in the front dismounted.

 

Otho shook his head and tapped Gaffer Gamgee on the shoulder.

 

"What's going on here?"

 

The gardener turned to him and shrugged his shoulders.

 

"Don't know. Although I recognize that dwarf there. He stopped and asked for directions almost a year and a half ago. Mr. Baggins left the next day with him and 12 others."

 

'Dwarf? Ah, now I remember.'

 

A exclamation of surprise rippled through the crowd and he turned to see the aged form of the Thain himself hobbling toward the dwarf.

 

'Just what was going on?'

 

/ ~ / ~ / ~ /

 

Thorin dismounted as soon as he saw the elderly form of the Thain approach him.

 

He bowed low to the hobbit.

 

"What is the meaning for this?"

 

"Forgive me. I am Thorin Oakenshield, Son of Thrain, Son of Thror, King Under the Mountain at your service."

 

The Thain nodded.

 

"And at yours, Your Majesty. But I must say I am confused by all this pomp and circumstance."

 

A pained look crossed the dwarf's face which caused a wave of dread to wash over him. 

 

"May we speak in private?"

 

The hobbit nodded and motioned behind him.

 

"Come. The Green Dragon has just what we need. Help an old man inside."

 

Thorin nodded.

 

/ ~ / ~ / ~ /

 

"Falco! Two ales here!"

 

The bartender nodded and quickly two mugs of ale were set down in front of them.

 

The Thain grabbed his arm before he turned and Falco leaned over to listen.

 

"Oh and Falco, privacy is most welcome at this time."

 

"Understood, Thain."

 

The elder Hobbit lifted the mug in a silent toast before taking a deep drink.

 

"Ahh! The finest ale this side of the Shire."

 

He noticed the dwarf king did not touch his.

 

'Most odd.'

 

"Very well, King Under the Mountain, I'll cut to the point...Why have you asked to meet me?"

 

The pained look came back again and the dwarf gave an audible sigh.

 

"I bring news of Bilbo Baggins."

 

The Thain sat straighter in his seat.

 

"Oh?"

 

"First I would have you know of the journey he had taken."

 

The Thain nodded in agreement.

 

"Well, I do enjoy a good story from time to time."

 

Thorin took a small drink from the mug before he started.

 

"It starts simply enough....

 

with the arrival of a Wizard and a glowing mark on a green door."

 

/ ~ / ~ / ~ /

 

The Thain was awestruck at the story the dwarf King had told him.

 

Belladonna Took would be proud.

 

Bilbo Baggins was definitely his mother's son.

 

But still that did not tell him of what had happened to the bachelor.

 

That sensation of dread hit him once again.

 

And when the dwarf fell silent and would not meet his eyes...it was then he knew.

 

"Bilbo isn't coming back alive, is he?"

 

"That is why I am here. To offer my apologies in person and to return his body to the land of his birth."

 

The elderly Hobbit wiped a tear from his face.

 

"I had held hope that he would return unhurt but even I do not know what the Valar have planned."

 

"I apologize again. I know now that he never should've went in the first place, but a part of me is glad he did."

 

Thain leaned onto his cane looking ath the dwarf with a twinkle in his eyes.

 

"And which part would that be, Your Majesty, if I may be bold to ask?"

 

Thorin nodded.

 

"My heart, Thain, my heart. I had not known until it was already too late."

 

"So that is why you came here in person. You loved him and so you brought his body home."

 

"I wish it was under different circumstances completely. He was my One and so I want to tell his family myself."

 

Thain nodded grimly.

 

"I regret to tell you that only a handful of his family reside here in Hobbiton. The only two he was very close to was Drogo and Primula Took."

 

"Then I would speak to them."

 

A grave nod was his answer.

 

"Drogo and Primula drowned naught a week ago. A tragedy that is, especially since it left young Frodo without parents."

 

Thorin closed his eyes in pain but opened them when the Thain spoke again head bowed in sorrow.

 

"That was the reason I had hoped that Bilbo was still alive. You see, Primula and Drogo chose Bilbo as Frodo's guardian should anything happen to them. Now that Bilbo is gone, there is no one to raise little Frodo but Otho and Lobelia."

 

Thorin didn't hesitate.

 

"I will take him."

 

The Thain looked up in shock.

 

"You?"

 

Thorin nodded.

 

"Yes. I can assure you that he will be well provided for."

 

The elder Hobbit shook his head.

 

"I don't know if that would be a good idea. A Fauntling is quite a handful."

 

The dwarf stood suddenly, startling the Thain.

 

"Bilbo was named guardian of this child and he is gone in no small part thanks to me, so I feel responsible for him. If I can atone for my short-comings as a leader and manage to honor Bilbo's memory, than allow me to raise the child."

 

The Thain smiled at Thorin sadly.

 

"I can see why my grandson would have fallen for you. You have honor, King Under the Mountain. Very well. I will let you have guardianship of Frodo in Bilbo's place."

 

"You shall not regret this. I swear it."

 

A wrinkled hand waved his words off.

 

"Well then, I suppose it's time to lay Bilbo to rest."

 

The dwarf could only nod in reply, fearing that his voice would break should he speak.

 

/ ~ / ~ / ~ /

 

All the Shire turned out dressed in their finest.

 

The burial of Bilbo Baggins was one to be remembered for many years to come.

 

For the dwarf king that loved him had fashioned the finest casket ever seen.

 

It was of pure white alabaster, encrusted with emeralds and edged in silver.

 

There were three sets of Dwarvish runes inscribed upon the lid in a circle.

 

"Âtamânel,

 

Ghivâshelûh,

 

Mizimelûh."

 

And in the very center of the runes in a setting of pure silver sat the Arkenstone.

 

Thorin stood at the right of the coffin dressed in clothes of dark blue edged in silver and a simple crown of gold resting upon his head. 

 

'Goodbye my Kidhuzurâl.'

 

A tug on his sleeve made him look down at the young boy standing next to him.

 

"You knew my uncle?"

 

Thorin knelt down to look the boy in the eyes.

 

"Yes, I did, little one."

 

The boy's eyes filled with tears.

 

"What's gonna happen to me now that Uncle Bilbo's gone?"

 

"The Thain has given me guardianship of you. If you want it of course."

 

"You gonna take me away to the mountains to live wit you?"

 

The dwarf nodded at the awed look in the Fauntling's eyes.

 

"Forever?"

 

Thorin shook his head.

 

"Not forever Frodo. You can come back and visit whenever you want."

 

"Pwomise?"

 

"I promise."

 

Frodo smiled widely and threw his arms around Thorin's neck.

 

'Oh thank you!"

 

Pain shot through Thorin's heart at the sight of the child's smile.

 

He smiled just like Bilbo.

 

'I will take care of him, Bilbo. He will not forget his Hobbit heritage.'

 

He looked up at the final resting place of Bilbo Baggins with tears in his eyes.

 

'I promise.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Âtamânel - (the) breath of (all) breaths
> 
> Ghivâshelûh – (the) treasure of (all) treasures
> 
> Mizimelûh – (the) jewel of (all) jewels
> 
> Kidhuzurâl - golden one

**Author's Note:**

> A.N: *bawling like a baby* Yes, I know...I'm horrible. I started thinking what would happen if Bilbo was the one to die in the end, instead of Thorin. And also what if Thorin didn't know he was in love with Bilbo until those last few moments...*bawls again*
> 
> I might make this a 2-shot, maybe the next part where he is taking Bilbo's body back to the Shire?


End file.
